-maggie:

i really HONESTLY don’t think i have a problem. i know i starve myself and maybe i should fix that but is it really that bad? i just did a checklist for an eating disorder and suffer most, if not all the warning signs.

i never considered myself to have problems but i’ve been full of self destructive thoughts and am actually starting to get desperate as of late to take any measure to get back down to where i was when i was around 16.

i don’t want to go to anyone in my family about it. i don’t want to be put in some kind of program. i don’t want to go off to some camp, i don’t want my refrigerator quarantined and least of all i don’t want food shoved down my throat and be forced to eat and be watched while i eat.

:’( i don’t want to think i have a problem- most girls are worried about their weight, right? i just….i don’t know. :( i’m so disappointed in myself and i’m realizing how badly my overall health and well being is suffering because of my lack of self esteem.

and it’s not just hurting me. it’s become such a problem that my boyfriend doesn’t even want to ever talk about my eating habits or how i look.

i don’t want to get help, but i do want someone to be there for me. :(

i am here for you bb :* aim me when you get a chance!