-maggie:

1. short ass shorts, especially when you have hairy chicken legs
2. ugly graphics. skulls, checkers, what have you.
3. ed hardy
4. ignorant graphic tees “bikini inspector” and “i’m good in bed, i can sleep all day.” way to look like you have five brain cells and respect for women
5. plaid golf shorts. it kicks my “douchebag radar” in the face
6. men in flip flops. hairy toes and ankles, no thank you
7. looney toons clothing, like taz with gold teeth and tweety with a doo-rag. you are a mature winner. so much so i cant fuck with you
8. skinny jeans- there is a difference between straightleg/bootcut/ and straight up penis-gag pants/jerk pants. i want to date a man, not a woman with balls
9. too-tight v-necks + uncontrollable chest hair. you call it hip i call it chest pubes
10. affliction, south pole, volcom (HATTE volcom), and other 12 year old brands. quit shopping in the little boys store and get on man status.
11. bondage pants. let’s advertise our fetishes
12. flames, dragons, kanji, potleaves
13. buying band shirts 2 sizes too small. man muffin tops are just as bad as women’s. so is butt lint and not-so-happy trails.
14. trenchcoats. only blade, shaft, and sephiroth are acceptable forms of la trench
15. the constant pullover hoodie that you’ve had since 6th grade - you and your bodily stains can chill at home, but not in public.

i don’t mind volcom and skinny jeans and flip flops :/